It’s no secret that my kids are my whole world. They are kind, respectful, mature….all the things you would expect me to say. As we moms know….no one sees our kids as we do. Granted, my kids aren’t perfect. I doubt yours are either. Honestly, I wouldn’t want ‘perfect’ kids. Flaws are good. Flaws make them (and me) human.
My flawed (but perfect…wink, wink) kids are grown now and as such our relationship has changed. I’m no longer the mom who enforces bedtimes and strict (good) eating habits. I’m the one they talk to about life issues; money problems, relationships, world events. As a mom, I love seeing my kids express their opinion about something. Standing for what you believe in is something the hubby and I hoped to instill, way back when they were young kids. We have succeeded.
As we moms know, the life of a mom (and dad too…but this post is about moms so take a seat gentlemen) is a constant roller coaster of emotions. We’re equally elated, depressed, terrified, and horrified on any given day. Love has never felt so extreme, but neither has hurt. Though neither of my kids ever pulled the “I hate you” blather some teenagers like to spew, I still felt their disappointment and disgust on occasion.
Here’s a little secret about we mommies out there….we never believe we’re good enough, making the right choices, instilling the proper values, etc. etc. etc. (the list is endless). We spend 9 months waiting for our babies to arrive, and all the subsequent years questioning ourselves. There is no handbook to raising children (though on a separate note I believe some “parents” should be required to pass a test). Kids come into our world and it’s one big guessing game….should I insist he/she eat carrots? Is this a cold, or something more serious? Is now a good time to talk about sex? Yeah…it’s endless alright. It’s a wonder our kids turn out as good as they do.
To you mommies out there, I’d like to offer this….my thanks and admiration. We aren’t told ‘thank you’ enough for this job we do of creating life and bringing it into the world. Lost among the pile of dishes and the larger piles of laundry, is the simple fact that we would do anything – anything and everything – to insure our children’s safety and well-being.
To any potential mommies out there (expectant or otherwise), I offer these oh-so wise words:
Doubts and child-rearing go hand in hand
There will be days you hate yourself for things you’ve said or done to them
There will be days you lock yourself in the bathroom, count to 10 and pray you don’t start swinging
There will be more days where you gaze into your child’s eyes and realize how damn lucky you are
This Mother’s Day, I hope you are spoiled rotten by your kiddos and spouse/partner/other. As you slog through pancakes made by a five year old’s loving hand, or sniff the flower your toddler brought to you that he/she pulled from your garden, remember how blessed we women are. Motherhood is a gift…a precious gift. Whether you do it mostly right, screw-up big time, or make a few really bad mistakes, you will always be a mom. Our kids are tough. They can handle the occasional spanking, the stern talking to, or the week spent being grounded. Trust me on this…they will be better adults because of this. And honestly, isn’t that really our job in a nutshell; raising good, responsible, kind, caring ADULTS?
To T & J….you both know how precious you are to me. Being your mom is the greatest ‘job’ I’ve ever had. I’m so proud of you both for the adults you are and for the children you used to be. I’m so grateful you still hug and kiss me and tell me daily how much you love me. I promise to never, ever take any of that for granted.
Happy Mother’s Day to all you beautiful, strong, wise, resilient mommies out there. Today (and every day) may you feels extremely blessed to hold that forever title.